mhm



yum.

slow. lets be slow. ill walk right by u and ignore u but only if u ignore me back
:)
*sarcasm*








so far everything has worked out. ive made consecutive wins, consecutive home runs. why loose when i have such a nice winning streak going for me?-- alright lets be honest. either at our hands we have 1. a social retard 2. just not interested..

neither of those are very appealing options. innovation...i need inspiration.
im fresh out of ideas but
im up at bat, and by damn i will do my team proud.
oy . aloiafjaskfjukj. so lets get this show on the road
i know u can run.fast,like uve got fire at your heels.

start running in this direction.

dashandimout.

beauty can transform anything, even the heart of a beast.

steph made a choice. and i want to know what it was like, i think all the times nadia keeps making stupid asshole nerd comments, i cant help but wonder, damn it, maybe thats exactly what i want

so up until this month i hadnt used my lj in like a year. pretty much. and now all my hard work and amazing backrounds and things are shot to shit. none of the old codes i used to use work so i need to figure out something new.


liz darling leave me a msg

today an old friend asked for my forgiveness
and i gave it.



all my words that i want to say
the silence that bleeds into the night
its louder then the sound of me screaming out my lungs


and i think maybe the ghosts dont need to haunt us anymore


" can we rest. buffy can we rest?" - btvs


so now, can we rest?

my confrontational nature masks my lack of trust, if you want something done right you have to do it yourself. not that in that respect, its gotton me far. everything is moving along at the nice slow pace of going nowhere and i doubt it will move along anytime soon




shatter into a million peices and blow away on the wind
because theres nothing holding me back

absoutly postively amazing. see i cant even spell anything right, not that i ever could. im a mess. this week has been a whirlwind. i dont mumble, but i mumbled. yesterday i managed to walk down an up escalator. i ran away, but since when do i run away, im such a confrontational person its ridiculous. im not a shy person. everything is right, yet i cant help but think it will just be another beautiful letdown. wouldnt be the first time. who knows, maybe the winning streak will continue ( xcross) i dont really feel like me, not sure what i feel like. sats r killing me. everythings loading up, but im okay with that i think. wow.



i think its just a new chapter in my life, that i cant wait to begin.

i had a dream i could fly.

and so i did.

Hammock Hockey (affliated with Mountain INC.)
1. objective : get the puck in the goal
2. a rough sport
3. requires padding.sometimes

situation xo: save a horse ride a cowboy

so finally i have seen the movie. it was a lot of fun. liz chased greg around throwing wallnuts at him. then he shoved it down his pants.

i bet he killed him son in the chocolatectory fa.


greg i have a funny eskimo song for u.



p.s. liz we need to go holiday shopping together and pick out u know what for greg. lol.

seasons of love.

last weekend - spent some time with lex, steph, biz, and jane. made biz a limbo palm tree picture. made a my space. went to visit westside collage with steph. met her crazy cat walking aunt. which was halarious her sister pam took videos and pictures. haha. it was fun. we went to a craft fair. i got my hair cut. i went to ac moore and panera with steph. looking fwd to tommarow bcuz there i have a study and a pep rally so a lot of nothing. woot then its thanksgiving break and my brothers coming home.

the problem i was dealing with. well things are a lot better and its not as bad as we thought so i am utterally, totally relievesd, and glad.


does anyone read my livejournal anymore... just out of curiosity..

last weekend. i did a lot of fun things.



but on saturday. i had the worst day of my entire life.

i told lex and steph. and they said we are there for me. and i know they are. but i cant call them at one in the mroning when i wake up and realise god the days are winding down

SugarCookie3219: im overtaking the monarchy, u r out of a job and im queen and king and villagers all at the same time. you lose


Jackie - King of the Mountain
Steph - got voted off
Lex - Company Pimp


... when u try to topple our empire u take the chairlift down the slope...




«c.a.glorificous..
© pics!
ginger mommy saved your fingers for you
hans hans, guntra guntra, and tarka.

SugarCookie3219: i know. its like a war. what have you fought for today?
I'll see you on the other side.

liz- ale maiden come get your ale, clevage couggh cough. free samples! laddies hethinkhimself a naughty school girl! tighty whites... wait, did u think those were tight biker shorts? or did the kilt get the best of ya? cheif butterscotch! i think its all because i like your arms... sexy arms... yes.

3 hours later i come back to my computer..
what exactly am i complaning about really?


there are worse things.
there are ppl starving in china- steph stanley
you could be a monk running around in the forest with no fingernails - lex
did someone order an apocolpse - btvs

me and lex were having a discussion. we both go through these dramatic phases. Sometimes we care about anything and everything and are extrememly emotional . other times we care about absolutlynothing and are concerned we are loosing humanity.


weve decided to trade emotions for now if that is possible.

ive given this thing how many years? so i put it in the aim profile so its offical. im giving it btwn 3-5 days. i dont realistically expect them to read my aim profile, to do anything about it, id be shocked. In fact i dont even expect them to remember im alive, bcuz that last bit, even thats appears to be too much of a challenge. so i want out. outtt. ive had enough. ive waited long enough for absolutly nothing to happen and its absolutly tragic that so many things were left unsaid. but thats how they want it so be it. ive waited for rain it to rain, and it didnt. i accept it. limbo was never there. it was just me believing against all odds that something existed between us but it didnt. nope.

so this journal entry right here, is for me. its just for me to come out and say it. finally. yes i still care, ive always cared for who in the hell knows what reason but i did. now im not remembering why anymore and its time to let it fall and blow away with the wind.

if you expect absolutly nothing, then you'll never be dissapointed.



a comment with this entry would be appreciated.

clearly i dont know where i am exactly right now. clearly. i mean look at the state of my lj?
i dont know who what when where how today. just enough to know what direction i need to walk towards for answers. i find myself backstage during drama sitting on the floor with absolutly nothing to say. its not that i dont have anythign to say . its just i dont have a reason to sing/ speak about. i guess i need to find something to sing about.

life isnt song
life isnt bliss
life is just living

yea im offended. just a little. way to remember im alive. thanks. no i just love how every time we see each other in the halls its like... wow i can't wait to get away from you... mhm how sweet.

last night i had a dream. i was the one leaving for college which doesnt make any sense but i said goodbye and they brought me a newspaper crossword and circled some words and gave it to me.

nah.